#39

Well life is going it's way, I've been thinking alot again.
I'm quite a thinker, always have been which also made me alot more mature then most kids of my age. I hate to see people of my age that even haven't got a clue about what they want in life. I know what I want, but at this moment I don't know how to get there. Sucks big time :p
Things are changing, for example I lost 3kg since I started with the cure that I talked about and I lost 29cm, alot of it on my legs, which already made me go from size 46pants to a size 44 pants ^.^ can't tell you guys how much that means to me.
But except from losing weight and looking as good as possible I also want to learn more and I want to find something that I'm good at that could earn me a bit more money.
But well that's not interesting, I'm just being weird anyway at this moment.
What I really wanted to write about is the weather of the past days. I don't like rain ! But god how I love the wind blowing through my hair and in my face. How I love just to walk against it, spreading my arms and look up at the sky, with my music playing out loud on my headphones.
Sometimes I feel one with nature, I think wind is my element together with earth, the moments that just make me think about nothing but just being are the moments that these elements take over.
I'm a dreamer, always been and always will be and I can't help it but sometimes my life seems like a nightmare although I'm not doing bad in fighting my demons.
Oh dear I'm just sooo tired that I probably sound like I'm on drugs or something :p
this little part of lyrics drew my attention this morning when I heard it on my Ipod
I open up my head inside
And find another person's mind
I'm gonna take this chance I've got
I run denying as we speak
Hiding my face among the weak
It felt so familiar, like the writer had the same going on in his head.
And when I'm sharing lyrics I can't help it but I <3 Buddha for Mary from 30 Seconds To Mars, this song has such an intense atmosphere, it gives me goosebumps everytime.

This are the lyrics, the vid also shows them but I think they're nicer when showed this way. I especially love the He said/She said part doesn't matter how "sick" it is.
A simple fear to wash you away
An open mind canceled it today
A silent song that's in your words
A different taste that's in your mind

This is the life on mars [x2]

Mary was a different girl
Had a thing for astronauts
Mary was the type of girl
She always liked to play a lot
Mary was a holy girl
Father wet her appetite
Mary was the type of girl
She always liked to fall apart

Tell me did you see her face
Tell me did you smell her taste
Tell me what's the difference
Don't they all just look the same inside?
Buddha for Mary, Here it comes

Mary was an acrobat
But still she couldn't seem to breathe
Mary was becoming everything she didn't want to be
Mary would hallucinate
And see the sky upon the wall
Mary was the type of girl
She always liked to fly

Tell me did you see her face
Tell me did you smell her taste
Tell me what's the difference
Don't they all just look the same inside?
Buddha for Mary, Here it comes
Buddha for Mary, Here it comes

This is the life on mars

He said, "Can you here me, are you sleeping"
She said, "Will you rape me now?"
He said, "Leave the politics to mad men"
She said, "I believe your lies"
He said, "There's a paradise beneath me"
She said, "Am I supposed to bleed?"
He said, "You better pray to Jesus"
She said, "I don't believe in god"

Mary was a different girl
Had a thing for astronauts
Mary was the type of girl
She always liked to play a lot
Mary was a holy girl
Father wet her appetite
Mary was the type of girl
She always liked to fall apart

Tell me did you see her face
Tell me did you smell her taste
Tell me what's the difference
Don't they all just look the same inside?
See her face, smell her taste
What's the difference?
Don't they all just look the same inside?

A simple fear to wash you away
An open mind cancelled it today